We live in a society where our worth is often defined by those around us — how many Facebook friends you have or who you’re with on a Friday night. So sometimes when you’re alone you can feel like it’s the end of the world and nothing will ever get better. It can feel like if nobody wants you now, then nobody will want you ever. I know how it feels, because I’ve been there. Everyone has. But this next part is where you need to pay attention.

You’re not alone. Stop feeling sad and look around for a second. Think about the people you’ve talked to today. How many people have asked “How are you?” or asked to have lunch with you? Did your roommate say “Good morning?” Not alone. Did a friend text you venting about their problems then asking about yours? You are not alone. You are never as alone as you think. That is a universal fact.

Now moving onto some lighter stuff! There are huge perks to being single. You can literally do whatever you feel like. Want to be flirty? Cool. Don’t want anything to do with the dating world? Cool. Want to dye your hair pink and learn to ride a unicycle? Great! This time is for you! Do all the things you always wanted to try. I’ve been waking up early to go swimming and I love it — because it’s something new. Trying new things is really important with being single. You can’t let yourself remain stagnant. As college students we are always told that we are adults. And in many ways we are. We are responsible for our own actions and choices. But that doesn’t mean we are done growing up. We are still changing and growing into the people we will eventually be. We haven’t finished evolving. We are still Charmeleons and are slowly reaching the Charizard inside. And because of this, it is desperately important that we try things on our own. I’m not saying you need to dump your significant other in order to grow, but trying things alone is important. Every time we try something new we learn a little more about ourselves. So try everything you’ve always wanted to! Put yourself outside your comfort zone! And I don’t mean go swim with bloodthirsty sharks, I mean try studying abroad. Or joining a new club on campus. Learn to speak a new language. Take some time to really soak up new experiences just for yourself.

And always remember there are people out there who care very much for you. Even when you’re sure that you’re alone. Last week I was positive that nobody out there actually wanted me around anymore. Then lo and behold, along comes Alpha Psi Omega, asking me to be an initiate of theirs! I felt so loved and appreciated, of course I said yes. And I didn’t even see them coming. You never know exactly who out there cares for you. But you have to rest assured that they exist. You’re not alone and you can be happy wherever you are in life.

 

Libby Trammell is majoring in human development and family studies. She can be emailed at [email protected].