&Dear Libby& tackles liars, majors and long distance love

Libby Hill

Libby Hill

Dear Libby: I have been working on my current major for three years, and now I’m fairly sure it isn’t what I want to do. While I’ve found something else I’d rather do, I don’t want to go to school for the next fifty years. Do you think I should change my major and see if I’m happier or try to graduate as early as possible? ~Indecisive on 6th Street

Dear Indecisive: What you need to determine is what’s more important to you: your happiness at this present time OR your happiness for the REST OF YOUR LIFE. Now, I can’t tell you whether this new major would fulfill all your dreams, but if you think it can, go for it. As unpleasant as more school may seem to you, I’d wager to say it’s a better option than spending the rest of your life in a job that stifles your spirit and your mind.

For more information about switching your major, contact the department you’re looking on transferring to. Generally, they should be able to put you in touch with an advisor who can walk you through exactly what you have to do to graduate. It may take less time than you fear.

Dear Libby: My boyfriend and I met after we decided where we were going to college. Now, I go to SDSU and he goes to Mines. I need to know whether we should try to stay together or see what happens. ~Lonely in Larson Commons

Dear Lonely: What you need to do is communicate all of your concerns to your boyfriend. Find out how he feels about trying to continue the relationship during the school year. Most importantly, if you decide to “see what happens” make sure each of you know what that means, whether it’s taking a break, seeing other people, staying exclusive or numerous other options.

And Lonely, please don’t feel as though I’m not giving your relationship a chance. If you think you can make it, have analyzed the decision and felt confident about it, then by all means go for it. As the old saying goes, “True love will find a way.”

Dear Libby~ I love my job but it stresses me out. Do you think I should drop my job or cut back on my classes? ~Frazzled on First Street

Dear Frazzled~ If you’re working such intensive hours due to financial difficulties then I suggest you look into student loans or scholarships.

Instead of quitting your job, can you ask to cut back hours?

As for dropping classes, in my opinion that depends on how far along you are. If you’re close to finishing, I’d avoid reducing your class load as long as your schedule does not adversely affect your academic output.

Remember, no one can do everything, not even you. There are plenty of people on campus who are willing to listen and help you figure things out, whether it’s your advisor or a counselor or even a professor. Take care of yourself, Frazzled. Everything else will figure itself out.

Dear Libby~ I dated a guy for five years. This summer, I found out he had a six year old son. I love my guy to death. I don’t mind that he has a child, but I’m hurt that he lied to me. Should I let him go? ~Betrayed in Brookings

Dear Betrayed~ Betrayed, your boyfriend lied to you for five years. He has a child. He has a lifelong responsibility, he has another human being who will always be tied to him in some way. He has baggage.

Think about it Betrayed, if your man could hide this and all that went with it then what else could he hide? Or for that matter, what else could he BE hiding? Trust is a beautiful, fragile thing, and it is the foundation of a strong relationship.

I know you love him, Betrayed, but think about yourself. Are you ready to be a mother figure? Are you ready to commit yourself to a man who you may or may not be able to trust? What you decide will undoubtedly affect the rest of your life.

Consider what you can and cannot put up with in a relationship. And if you decide to stay with this man then you be sure to lay down specific rules about how the relationship will run in the future. And if he lies to you again, walk away. Just walk away.

Ask Libby Hill for advice at [email protected]