Libby advises on nosy neighbors, new romance

Libby Hill

Libby Hill

Dear Libby,

I have recently been totally creeped out by this guy who lives in my apartment building. He always says hi to me and I always respond politely.

However, I’m starting to think that he kind of has a “thing” for me and it’s making me uncomfortable. Whenever I see him, I try to avoid him and hope he doesn’t notice me, yet he always does, and then, to make things worse, tries to give me a high five. It really weirds me out.

As if that isn’t enough, he somehow knows where I live, and since I definitely didn’t tell him, I have no idea how he got that information. What should I do?

– Unsettled in Bailey Hall

Dear Unsettled,

Well, first off, I have a little bit of confusion that I just have to mention. You say that this guy who lives in your apartment building somehow found out where you live. And that you didn’t give him that information, so you’re stumped as to how he deciphered your location. Hmm. Yeah. Well then, it sounds to me as though the guy just assumed that you lived in the building. And from what you’re telling me it doesn’t seem as though you gave him any reason to suspect that you inhabited a Batcave-esque hidden compound, so he probably just jumped to the most logical conclusion.

You could confront this guy and mention your discomfort at his standard high five greetings. Or you could tell him that you just want to be friends with him, but at this point, you may be just misreading the signals that he’s giving off. To the best of my interpretation skills, this guy just seems a little over-friendly. I’m guessing a few weeks of the cold shoulder and unreciprocated high fives should clear up this minor irritation. Best of luck.

Dear Libby,

Last year I met the most incredible guy. We were pretty much just study buddies since we shared a couple of classes and occasionally we would go and see a movie.

This year we got in touch again and have been seeing each other quite regularly even though we no longer have any classes together. It’s becoming increasingly obvious that we’re no longer “just friends.”

The problem is, he just got out of a very bad relationship and I’ve been burned too, relationship-wise, recently. I would really like for things to go further with this guy but I’m unsure how to bring it up or even what to say. I just don’t want it to seem like I am pushing things too far, too fast. Any ideas?

–Questioning on Campus

Dear Questioning,

It sounds like right now you’re doing things just right. It’s important not to rush into another relationship, especially since it seems like you really like this guy and the last thing you want to do is throw away your chance at a lasting relationship by forcing it along.

However, I think it’s important for the two of you to at least have a casual conversation about where you stand, otherwise, you could still end up getting hurt. I would suggest telling your guy friend how you feel about all of this. I know it’s a really scary prospect, but hopefully, it’ll make each of you comfortable enough to be open in the future, which is an important key to any good relationship.

While not a trained counselor, Libby loves to give advice. E-mail her at [email protected]