A handy, dandy guide to SDSU’s structures


What follows is a brief description of the many, many buildings of SDSU and what you can expect to find in each and every one. Plus they’re listed numerically, so you can get from 1 to 83 even if you have no idea where Administration is!

Please don’t get the idea that we hate any of these buildings. Indeed, we lavish them all with LOVE and AFFECTION. We feel that strongly.Enough of this! Commence with the listing!

1. Dean of Agriculture Residence (Former): It doesn’t exist anymore. Do not be misled by the map, children!2. Motor Pool Complex: Where the cool kids go to get cars. But you can’t have one.3. Ag Vehicle Storage: It’s just like home, but less rusty.4. Bailey Hall: Many of those high-falutin’ sophomores call this home.5. Berg Hall: If you are ever lucky enough to live here, you’ll have cows as neighbors.6. Hansen Hall: Beware of random sheep.7. Agricultural Heritage Museum: This is where they store the things too old or too nice for Ag Vehicle Storage.8. Medary Commons (CAP Center, Food Service): Where the kids from Hansen eat their vittles.9. Wenona Hall: Identical to Wecota, but not nearly as homey.10. Wecota Hall: Rooms and offices. Offices and rooms.11. Wecota Annex: Tiny rooms=rustic.12. Waneta Hall: Home of the older kids who are too cool for off-campus.13. West Hall (Student Health): Former home of the Brookings County morgue!13. Student Health (West Hall): The best healthcare you can afford as well as the greatest incentive to work towards a benefits package.14. Woodbine Cottage: A tiny, delicate dollhouse for our beloved president.15. Alvida M. Sorenson Family Resource and Management Center (FRMC): Don’t let them fool you. This is really the UPD building.15. University Police Department: Don’t let them fool you. This is really the Alvida M. Sorenson Family Resource and Management Center.16. Scobey Hall: Where a lot of your professors huddle in their dark offices and copy the works of Immanuel Kant by hand.17. Tompkins Alumni Center Clock Tower: Should have been used in the film “Back to the Future.”18. Tompkins Alumni Center (SDSU Alumni Association): A special building where only SDSU grads can enter without turning into pillars of salt. 19. South Dakota State University Foundation: Three months after you graduate, they will call you up and ask for more money.20. Pugsley Continuing Education Center (RDTN Studios/Classrooms, Christie Ballroom): There is a daycare here, so you can safely walk through the halls screaming “Booger!”21. Lincoln Music Center (Peterson Recital Hall): The old building on campus that makes you feel like you’re paying $30,000 a year to go to school here.22. Sylvan Theatre: Not used much, but damn is it pretty!23. Coughlin Campanile: You’ve seen it. It’s the big tall thing you make jokes about.24. South Dakota Art Museum: For those interested in expanding their knowledge of Harvey Dunn beyond the Crossroads Hotel in Huron.25. Agricultural Hall: Where you’ll dissect fetal pigs in bio survey.26. Dairy Microbiology: They’re hoping to come up with a shiz-nit flavored ice cream.27. Plant Science Seedhouse: Located kind of far away from the Plant Science building.28. West Headhouse and West Greenhouses: They sure do grow a lot of plants here.29. Wheat Commission Greenhouse: Only wheat has been commissioned to grow here.30. Animal Science Complex: Studying the ever-so-popular science of animals.31. Animal Science Arena: Where they show horses and such.32. Animal Resource Wing: Wing as in building, not appendage.33. Veterinary Isolation Building. Where cows go to be alone.34. Animal Disease Research and Diagnostic Laboratory: This is where people send the heads of their rabies-infested dogs. Seriously!35. Foundation Seed Conditioning Plant: Sounds pretty impressive, doesn’t it?36: Northern Plains Biostress Laboratory: The really, really nice building where they cut up dead things.37: Physiology Laboratory: Oh look! Another lab! You science folk have to walk around a lot.38: Plant Science West Greenhouses: Not to be confused with the West Tennis Courts.39: East Headhouse: Stop laughing. It’s really not that funny.40: Plant Science Building: Pretty self-explanatory.41: Horticulture and Forestry: Here you can learn how to graft Venus Fly-Traps onto Weeping Willows and make a super-race of swampy vegetation that eats butterflies.42: Horticulture Greenhouse: Yet another greenhouse and still not green. They’re just out to mislead you at every turn, huh?43: Sexauer Field: The old-looking track where people run like pasty gazelles.44: Ethel Austin Martin Building (Biology Annex): We don’t know what goes on in this building. We’ve never been allowed to enter. We hope it’s some sort of secret ritual. If it’s not, that would be boring.45: Intramural Building: Sometimes people call it “The Barn” because our campus has a definite lack of ag-related buildings.46: Yeager Hall (U.S. Post Office, Central Mail, Print Lab): Come to buy stamps. Leave with a greater sense of well-being.47: Shepard Hall: Two words: old and uncomfortable.48: Guilford C. Gross Pharmacy Building: This is where legal drug pushers get their training.49: Heat/Power Laboratory: Where they experiment with HEAT and POWER. Muahahahahah.50: Central Heating Plant: The main source of hot air on campus not associated with administration.51: Administration Building (Doner Auditorium): Financial Aid, The Registrars’ Office and Culture rolled into one musty old building.52: Communications Center (University Relations): This is where your viewbooks came from.53: Agricultural Communi-cations Center (AgComm): Seriously, AgComm is a way cool nickname. Why can’t more buildings be named like this? We can see the possibilities already. CoughCamp! ArtMu! And so on!54: Solberg Hall: Where the original Briggs and Stratton was invented. Stupid lawnmowers!55: Industrial Arts Building: Shop teachers …56: Crothers Engineering Hall: Some of those strange fees on your bill end up here.57: United Campus Ministries: A church that you can attend in your pajamas.58: Harding Hall: I think they solve equations and stuff …59: Rotunda for Arts and Science: The funny round building where you are truly just a number.60: Nursing, Family and Consumer Sciences, and Arts and Science Building (NFA): It’s the professional looking building next to the weird round one.61: DePuy Military Hall: Where the juggling and unicycling club meets.62: Memorial Park: The former West Tennis Courts. Now a thoughtful place to remember those who died for the U.S. of A.63: Library (Hilton M. Briggs Library): Maybe you should try to find this place before finals week.64: Physical Plant Shops: Where your parking ticket money goes.65: University Stores and Services: No … it’s not a mall. It’s just some buildings packed full of stuff.66: Coughlin-Alumni Stadium: Two things happen here: football games and marching band formations.67: Coughlin-Alumni Stadium Locker Room: Two things happen here: pep talks and towel snapping.68: Agricultural Engineering: Where you build the things that will later be in Ag Vehicle Storage.69: University Student Union (Volstorff Ballroom, Food Service, Dept. of Student Activities and Bookstore): Supposed to be the coolest building on campus.70: Mathews Hall: Hmmm … spelled with two Ts or one? You’ll figure it out eventually.71: Grove Hall: It’s that little building where the art students do their art thing.72: Pierson Hall: Where the honors floor students meet to plan their eventual world domination.73: Brown Hall: Where future engineers take their vow of silence.74: State Court: This is where you live if you’re married and poor.75: State Village: This is where you live if you’re married and really poor.76: Binnewies Hall: Hell for people that try to write you but cannot spell. 77: Larson Commons (Food Service): I wouldn’t call it a service. More like a confidence scheme.78: Young Hall: The Siamese twin of Binnewies.79: East Tennis Courts: Not to be confused with the non-existent West Tennis Courts.80: Stanley J. Marshall HPER Center (Frost Arena): Where you’ll think about working out … but it will be too cold out.81: Performing Arts Center: Not associated with livestock.82: Catholic Campus Parish: The easiest confessional in town.83: United Lutheran Center: A church where you can attend in your pajamas and eat lutefisk.