Krista Tschetter

After a public outcry from hobos and hobo-sympathizers, SDSUs Student Organizers of Hobo Days Committee decided quickly to make a big change.

Next year Hobo Days will be re-named: Economically Defunct Transient Appreciation Days.

“When I was passing through Tulsa on the 3 a.m., I found me a stray behind a packing crate,” said Curly Daniels, an active hobo.

“That dog was all I had, and he up and died. It gets tough on the road. We just want all people and Jackrabbits to know we ain’t monsters … we’re just economically defunct transients.”

Curly, who spearheaded a cross-country petitioning campaign throughout the South and Midwest, collected over 11,317 signatures protesting the Hobo Days name. He also got support from a national Hobo Organizers for Rights (HOR).

Curly and several of his transient colleagues, Cue and Jim Beam, presented the petition to the committee at their winter meeting. The seven members unanimously decided for the name change after only 15 minutes of deliberation.

“We just thought, you know, they already have to be all dirty and ride on those icky trains,” said committee head Lisa Marie Smalls.

“I mean, JACKS FOOTBALL STILL RULES MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE EVER! A silly name change won’t change that fact.”

Committee adviser Rhonda Telkampen agrees with the students’ decision.

“Well, we know that’s a lot of tradition to be messing with, so we didn’t take the decision lightly,” she said.

“We just hope people still feel free to get sloppy drunk all day long … not on school grounds of course (laughs). Wouldn’t want St. Paddy’s to pull ahead for best day of the year to get sloshed on.”

While little student opposition has been voiced, the committee knows they have to be careful to keep some traditions intact. But they handling everything with kid gloves.

“We’re thinking of changing it to Slighty-Unkempt-Lil’ and Property-Ownership-Disadvantaged Phil, you know, because we don’t want to give people the skewed impression that hobos are ‘dirty’,” said Telkampen.

“We’ll see what we can come up with.”

As for his victory, Curly considers it only a small step in the plight of hobos everywhere. He is also planning a trip to Notre Dame to contest the violent implications of the “Fighting Irish” nickname.

“I’m also a quarter Irish, and I just can’t stand for no disrespect from that other college either,” Curly said. “I’ve got a train to catch.”