Libby advises on how to break the ice, graduation angst
April 7, 2003
Libby Hill
Dear Libby,
I met the most amazing and wonderful guy during spring break. He goes to school here, but since we’ve been back from spring break I haven’t seen him once and have no idea how to approach him, even if I DID see him.
I really like him and would really like to ask him out, but I just don’t know how to break the ice and ask him out. Please help!–Stressing in Mathews
Dear Stressing,
Unfortunately, you didn’t really tell me how much personal information you have about the guy, so I’m going to have to make this up as I go along. It sounds to me like you really dig this guy and the only advice I can give you is to bite the bullet and get in touch with him.
Depending on whether you have it or not, I personally would opt for trying to e-mail the guy first, as that’s a more anonymous and less pressure-filled way to say, “Hi. Remember me?” If you don’t have his e-mail address and have no way of obtaining it, you should try and give him a call (assuming you have his phone number) and very casually ask if he wants to get together sometime, since you both had such fun together over spring break.
However, if all you know is where this guy lives, well, then that leads to some very frightening options. You could go right to his door and ask to see him, or you could just hang around where he lives and try and “accidentally” bump into him one day. Both of which have slightly creepy overtones. As for breaking the ice, I would say just try and be the fun girl that he met over spring break. Chances are he’ll have such good memories of the time, he’ll warm up instantly.
Dear Libby,
I’m getting ready to graduate in May. I think that most people would be happy to be in my situation, but I myself am confused. I don’t know what I want to do for a job, or even where I want to live. I am so used to the structure of school, registering for next semester, knowing absolutely what I’ll be doing in September, that I’m just so confused about future being so unknown.
I feel like my family and friends probably expect me to go out and get some prestigious job, but I don’t have much ambition. I’m scared of going out on my own, but I don’t want to move back in with my parents either. Do you have any advice for me?–Confused Senior
Dear Confused,
Believe it or not, I do completely understand you’re situation. You’re facing a very major life change and it’s absolutely normal to be conflicted as to what you want to do next.
What you need to do is not pay any attention to what your friends and family “expect” from you. You need to focus on what it is will make you happy, regardless of whether or not it’s a highfalutin’ job or not. I advise you to sit down and think about what it is you can see yourself doing for the rest of your life. You don’t mention your major, so I can’t personally give you any options, but I’d say that there are individuals in your major, your advisor for instance, who could help you work through your confusion.
In addition, I think that seeking about a counselor at student health would definitely be something to look into. It’s paid for already and that’s what they’re there for: to help you work through difficult decisions.
To finish up, you may also want to stop by the CAP center for more help regarding employment and the like.
E-mail Libby Hill at [email protected].