Brian Kimmes

After the craziness of the Women’s National Invitation Tournament, my life has become much less hectic. During the winter sport season, especially the last few weeks of the women’s basketball season, I was always on the go. But the spring season here at SDSU has been marred by poor weather, eliminating every home game to date. So what am I, a true South Dakota State sports enthusiast, to do?

The obvious solution is to drink myself into oblivion. Well, maybe not. That probably just leads to problems that I don’t want to deal with.

Maybe I should focus more on my schoolwork. I became so wrapped up in the WNIT, I neglected all of my classes. I suppose now would be a great opportunity to re-immerse myself in my studies. But wait, I am graduating. No need to do that.

Maybe I can go outside and enjoy the nice, spring weather. Oh wait, that’s right. We are in the middle of winter still. It’s too bad I put my ice skates and skis away and brought out my baseball glove and Frisbee. I guess I can’t go outside and play with my friends after all.

Maybe I can learn to read. Well, I know how to read, but maybe I can learn to enjoy it. I’ve been known to read the sports page, and the occasional movie review, but that is about it. I recently spent some time in Barnes & Noble, and the place was filled with these things called books. And they weren’t textbooks. They were books people read for fun.

Hmm … reading for fun. I suppose I could give that a try. But wait, if I read, then when am I going to watch television? And besides, the only reading I’m going to do is for class, and that rarely happens.

Maybe I can get a hobby. Perhaps I should build model cars or put ships in bottles. Or perhaps not. I have little-to-no finger dexterity. Typing is about as sophisticated I get when it comes to using my fingers. Besides, hobbies are for old people and shut-ins, right?

Maybe I could learn how to sew. On second thought, maybe not. I think I would have to kick my own ass if I learned to sew. I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror.

Maybe I can get a girlfriend. Of course, that is easier said than done. I need to find a woman willing to tolerate my shenanigans, not an easy task. I have looked for a woman before, to no avail. I don’t think I want to try again and go through the humiliation and rejection once more.

Maybe I can take up video or computer games. Of course, then I would have to become afraid of women, get fat and develop bad acne. Maybe I don’t want to play video games.

Maybe I can get hooked on professional sports. Yeah, I think that’s the ticket. The NHL playoffs are about to begin, and playoff hockey is always intense. And the NBA playoffs are just around the corner. The NBA is almost unbearable to watch, save the Phoenix Suns and the Dallas Mavericks, during the regular season, but come playoff time, the games are decent.

And of course, baseball season is here. The Minnesota Twins always make for fun television and discussion. The season is still young, so all teams are in contention. No matter how bad a team does the first month of the season, fans still have hope their team can turn it around and get back into playoff contention.

After sifting through the options, it appears I need to become a professional sports fan. The other options just don’t work for me. Go Wild, Suns and Twins.

#1.883398:2207854054.jpg:ball_talk.jpg:Brian Kimmes, Ball Talk: