Laura Lucas

For the past month, I have worked at a bar. Before working at one, I would only go downtown about once a month (if that). I am also not a big drinker so beers like Dogsnot stout or Fishtail ale sound distasteful to me. However, there are a few things I have learned.

The first thing I have learned is people need to get out of a server’s way. If you have a drink in your hand, please either sit down somewhere or go away from the bar area. People who stand right next to where other servers or I go to order are in the way.

Also, if you are standing where a server is trying to go, please get out of the way. Standing your ground is not a good idea. I might be a little person, but if I am on a mission to get five drinks to one table, get outta the way. I WILL knock you over and make you spill half a drink while preserving all of mine.

Another thing I have learned is if a person is going to pass out, do it at home. Personally, I do not care if you want to pass out in a booth. I would actually like to have one person do this per shift. Mainly because I like being the one to wake your dumb butt up with a tall glass of ice cubes and water. Kicking someone out gives me a boost of adrenaline; therefore, waking me up at 1 a.m.

I have also learned if you want a drink quickly either sit at a table or sit at the bar. Do not lean on the bar. Bartenders hate when people – yes, even girls with low tops – lean on the bar to “grab their attention.” It would be like sitting on a keyboard while a receptionist is trying to type. Basically, you are in the way.

This brings me to another thing I have learned. Girls with low tops and Victoria Secret cleavage should not play pool. I understand you look great and want to show others. However, maybe you should consider going dancing or to a house party instead.

Another thing I have learned is, if you want excellent service, don’t upset a server. Women who work in bars stick together, and if you are a name-calling patron, don’t expect service. If a male whistles, grabs at or says “hey honey/ baby/ doll-face,” your drink might not be what was ordered.

In summary, be nice to a server in a bar. If not, you might be pushed, be bruised, get a cup of water in your face or just be humiliated.