Libby advises woman with crush, miffed girlfriend

Libby Hill

Libby Hill

Dear Libby,

I have a dilemma. Last year, while I was participating in Capers I got a crush on this guy that I met. Then this year, as I saw him again in Capers and at some parties and got to know him better, I found myself liking him even more!

I like how he smiles and I like his eyes and I like his personality. Sometimes, I even find myself wishing that I wasn’t graduating this year so I could be around for another semester so I could see him more, even though I know that’s totally stupid.

The thing is, we’re the same age and I really, really like him and I really want to tell him that. I’ve even written a letter to him explaining my feelings for him, but I haven’t had the courage to give it to him. Should I send the letter? What should I do? Help me, please! In Love in Larson Complex

Dear In Love,

I think that you owe it to yourself and to this guy to at least tell him of your interest in him. However, I think you need to tread lightly, as telling a heretofore clueless guy about your willingness to not graduate in order to be with him, has the definite potential to completely freak him out.

Think about perhaps composing a brand new letter just telling him that you’re interested in seeing him more often and maybe eventually being more than just friends. Include your phone number and e-mail address and then leave the ball in his court. From there you could definitely see where he stands on the issue, while also having the freeing experience of letting him know exactly how you feel.

Dear Libby,

I’m writing to you because I’m very upset with my so-called boyfriend. We’ve been dating for over 8 months now and I was really looking forward to doing something special and memorable for our first Valentine’s Day together.

My boyfriend didn’t have the same thought as I did. Instead of getting me flowers or taking me out to dinner, he thought it would be “cool” if he just had a bunch of friends over to play some stupid shoot-’em-up X-box game that he just bought. When I got upset, he told me I was “totally over-reacting” and that “Valentine’s Day is totally overrated and he didn’t buy into all that mushy stuff anyway.”

I bought him a nice watch and at the very least thought he would want to spend some time with me, but I guess I was wrong. Now I’m wondering if I’m wrong about this whole relationship. If he felt this way about Valentine’s Day, shouldn’t he have MENTIONED it at some point? Now what do I do? Miffed in Mathews Hall

Dear Miffed,

I’m sorry to hear about your horrid Valentine’s Day and maybe it is time for you to reevaluate your relationship. This may be nothing. Your boyfriend may actually not like Valentine’s Day and just assumed that you felt the same way. Occasionally people (not just men) tend to be slightly insensitive and assume that their partners feel the same way about everything as they do.

However, if this is just a single event in a whole series of blow-offs that have happened recently, then maybe you should think about making a change. You need to sit down with your boyfriend and tell him (calmly) how upset all of this has made you. Hopefully he’ll be able to see that his actions really hurt you and try and rectify the situation. And if he doesn’t, then perhaps you need to start looking for a more sensitive guy.

E-mail Libby Hill at [email protected].