Skinners goes to the Big Top

John Hult

John Hult

The next time you paint the town, watch out.

You may get painted.

In a move that surprised, well … everybody … Skinner’s Pub announced Monday that they planned to abandon their seemingly popular Irish pub atmosphere in favor of a more friendly circus atmosphere.

The move came after the three-story club was purchased sometime last week by eccentric Mississippi theme club mogul P.T. McGuilicuddy.

McGuilicuddy made the announcement after a super duper top-secret meeting in the basement of the establishment with local pub magnate and circus freak in his own right Charlie Maricle, who owns Chevy’s, Jim’s Tap, The Jackalope Lounge, O’Hare’s, Ray’s Corner, The Safari Lounge and the Family Dollar.

McGuilicuddy said that he and Maricle decided to make the move based on a bet made during a particularly energetic game of Go Fish.

“I was in the hole, you know,” McGuilicuddy said. “I didn’t have any cash left and I had already given up my trousers, so I bet Chuckles here 53 cents that I could sell more booze than him even if my bar looked like a circus.”

Although the idea sprang from a drunken wager, McGuilicuddy promised that his colorful new concept would win over the town.

“I think people really miss being a kid-I know I do. Nothing says ‘I’m young again!’ quite like the circus?” McGuilicuddy said.

Plans to revamp the bar will include the introduction of theme drinks, face painting, trapeze acts and a petting zoo. Servers will wear clown suits at all times and bartenders will serve as Emcees at the newly rechristened “Big Top Skinners.”

Just for fun, McGuilicuddy said, he plans on adding a few exploding cigars to the stock already available. Patrons whose cigars explode will receive a certificate for a free drink, but will have to drink from a seltzer bottle.

Maricle, for his part, was undaunted.

“This backwoods bumpkin may think he’s the hot lunch, but he’ll never out-sell me” Maricle said. “Who was the genius who put a big pink car in his bar? Yeah, that was me. This fool’s got nothing on my innovation.”

#1.887087:3886405259.jpg:Skinners.jpg:An artist?s rendering of what Big Top Skinner?s will look like when all the circusy craziness is added. :